The Big 3-0 is looming…

My birthday is less than a month away now. It falls on Easter this year. It’s fallen on or around Easter several times before, but the most memorable Easter themed birthday celebration was in 1985. My sister was born less than a month before it and even though my birthday was technically the day after Easter this particular year, I celebrated it in my Easter dress with a bunny shaped cake and egg hunting. 

The fact that I’m turning thirty this year feels a bit depressing. How have three decades of my life passed so quickly? Why do I feel like the last ten especially never even really happened? In my mind, I still feel a lot more like I’m twenty than about to turn thirty. What does it mean to be thirty? Do I have to start officially acting older? Will birthdays ever hold the excitement they always have for me again after this one?

I remember turning twenty-five and feeling like I was already having some sort of mid-life crisis. My life, as I’d planned it, was nowhere near where I thought it’d be by twenty-five. As I’m about to turn thirty, it still isn't. I have to admit this bothers me more than I wish it did.

I try to remind myself that life just happens. You can plan small bits of it, but it doesn't mean it will completely turn out that way. There are other factors that play into how your life turns out. No matter how hard you try to have absolute control of it, the truth is you don’t. These reminders feel harder to swallow with every year I age though. I feel like time is slipping away from me and if I don’t do something to somehow trap it and slow it down soon, it will be over before I know it. I don’t want to have reached the end with zero accomplishments under my belt, or none of the goals I’d hoped to achieve in life complete.

If I could go back to little kid Sarah and give her some advice, it’d be to: Stop wishing you were older so much. It’s not all that glamorous. And all those years you spent wishing for a future you’d later find was nothing like you imagined could have been better spent enjoying being a kid. Something you will miss terribly when you actually are older.

We grow up too fast, in my opinion. Turning thirty, already…. it feels like it happen overnight almost. *sigh* I hope my negative outlook doesn't ruin the day when it finally arrives.

  
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5 Responses to "The Big 3-0 is looming…"

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  1. edgyauthor

    March 22, 2012 at 8:17 am

    Aww, that’s such an adorable pic of you with your bunny cake! :)

    I’m sorry you’re feeling so depressed about turning thirty, though. *hugs* I know I can’t fully relate to this yet, since I’m younger, but I also find myself wondering where the time has gone a lot and can’t believe I’m already in my twenties and technically an adult; I still feel like a kid! Hopefully this won’t weigh you down once your birthday is actually here so you can enjoy it like you deserve!

    • SarahWhisted

      March 25, 2012 at 1:54 am

      Thanks! So far the plans for my birthday celebrations are making me feel a little less depressed about it all, but who knows what I’ll actually feel like when the day arrives.

      • edgyauthor

        March 26, 2012 at 10:13 pm

        You will feel AWESOME!

        *sprinkles magical glitter on you to ensure my statement comes true*

        • SarahWhisted

          March 26, 2012 at 10:24 pm

          OMG you have magical glitter?

          PLEASE SEND JUST THAT FOR MY BIRTHDAY!

          I need it, yo! 😛

          • edgyauthor

            March 27, 2012 at 1:01 am

            Balty stole the magical glitter for me by punching a fairy in the face. I used the last of it on you to make sure your birthday is extra awesomely-awesome with awesome sprinkles on top. The boy is always trying to make me pay attention to him, and only him, though, so maybe he’ll steal more in time for me to send some for your birthday as a way to further win me over. XD

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